on crossroads…..

(That day last year when Toronto faced a severe ice storm and a storm of heavy emotions filled me in. It was a tussle between my responsibilities to the family that I was born in and to the one that I was going to be a part of.)

Just like the weather outside, a storm has stirred up my emotions. It was not an unexpected one but it happened in a way that has left me dwelling over my future.

A challenge to balance my responsibilities as a daughter and duties as a daughter-in-law (how I hate this word). My experiences with these situations are still new but not unfamiliar. From the family I belong, to the families I have known over my entire life till date, this cross roads is a part and parcel of every married woman that I know of. Whether you want to fight it or not, this is a war you are by default a part of. Sadly, most of the women I know are still struggling to find peace in this chaos but losing their own self in the process.

My reason to fight for and the one to fight with are the same. The love of my life. The fight is not with our families but with the circumstances. The topic of where to settle and how, doesn’t come easy when you and your soulmate are settled in 2 completely different countries on two distinct corners of the world. The decisions are more rather chances that you are willing to take to make things work with no guarantee of how things will work. After living abroad for more than 3 years, I now know this better that this has been the easiest decision to make and most difficult one to live up to till date. And now here I am again on the crossroads.

The question is will she fall prey to the implications of living abroad for the sake of her own family en route to residency or will she leave everything she has ever accomplished to live the life she has dreamt of with the love of her life or is their a way out ??

From where I stand right now, all that I have in my mind is if I will be able to live upto the expectations of my new family, the promises done to my parents and the life that we dreamt of as a couple? But one thing is certain, that I can stand by is, whatever happens will all be worth it. Whatever I do or wherever life takes me, if I have a rock solid support system in the person I am going to spend the rest of my life with, then life’s good. Even in these ice storms, like today.

I promise, to figure it out. We will figure it out, together in LOVE.

XOXO

∞Renuka∞

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