Long distance relationships: The secret revealed


I remember a quote from Nicholas Sparks, “Sometimes you have to be apart from the people you love, but that doesn’t make you love them any less. Sometimes you love them more.” Various times in my life, I have been questioned about my perception on love, especially long distance relationship. It’s not new, it will never be. It’s easier to talk about things you don’t understand and difficult to explain things that are meant to be felt. Love is a feeling all by itself and that itself is an expression. If you don’t feel it, less are the chances that you will ever understand it.

It’s definitely hard and there is no doubt about it.  Being miles apart, with boundation of time and distance ruling you, the urge of meeting again, the hope of him having the same emotions, the sadness of not being with him on good and bad times, the increased importance of a phone call and a message from that special someone in your life and the fear of not losing the commitment you had with each other. It’s a long, tough road; one less frequented by choice and more taken up under the toll of circumstances and career pressures. It’s as hard as living in two separate world’s and still trying to be together, as hard as the intake of oxygen in a low pressure situation. I might seem to be over exaggerating the situation but for the ones who have been through it, know it’s intensity and know that it is the only thing that gets even more challenging with time.

To answer the question the people ask, what still keeps your love alive and how do you deal with it? I would like to say that their are only few relations in life that you get to choose by yourself and when you choose them, you do not add clause of distance or time to it. Eventually with time you realize how strong your bond is and how fonder have you both grown of one another. You know that you cannot live without him/her but you grow separately in different cities or countries and still manage to get butterflies when that special someone calls you or comes to see you. One of the Instagram posts I read that said, “Good relationships not just happen. They take time, patience and two people really wanting to be together.” Just like you grow away from your parents but you do not end up choosing another parents (LOL). Because it is never an option, then why should your true love be.

The beauty of being in a long distance is that, you have already been tried and tested by adversities of time and now you better know whether you like, love or don’t feel anything about a person. You exactly know where your heart is. You begin to respect time, moments, holidays, memories, family time more than any other individual. Even if you get to see him/her for a day, a week or a month, you miss them as soon as they are about to leave. Nothing seems sufficient. Despite all those friends and good friends that you have in your life, you know how no one can ever replace the absence of that special someone.

You grow fonder of text messages, surprises and video calls. And despite the time differences of the places you are living in your heart and mind both get accustomed to two zones, consciously or subconsciously. ‘I love you’ and ‘I miss you’ become underrated and insufficient expressions and you start looking for new one. And the bond gets even stronger when you have a soul mate complimenting and sharing all the same feelings even miles apart making you realize what ‘togetherness’ actually means. It is then you get to know that ‘long distance’ is merely a tag and it’s just the relationship and love that two souls share that makes it worth what it is.

Words will always fall short while describing such things and emotions. What do you feel?



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